Relationships are most important starting with your relationship with Jesus. Jesus chose his disciples wisely. The disciples were his closest friends. It is important for us to follow His example. When choosing our closest relationships, we should look at Jesus’ example and be intentional with who we choose.

My best friend in my teenage years and beyond was my mother. No matter what was going on in life, she was always there for me. She would often just show up when she knew I needed her and I never had to ask. She always loved me and was active in my life even when I was making poor choices. Her love was unconditional, like the love of Jesus.

In high school, I chose to hang out with my mom over friends. Part of that was fear of losing her after my dad died when I was 15 years old. However, I enjoyed her company. We did everything together. We cleaned house together, we shopped together, and I always accompanied her when she went out to eat with friends. Her friends became my friends. Now that I am older, I believe teenagers need to have friends their own ages, but my mom and I were in survival mode after the death of my dad. Working through the grief brought us so much closer. She was also teaching me how to live without her some day.

When I went off to college at Auburn, Mom got a 2nd job. She told me it was to keep her busy because she would be lonely without me. As I got older, I realized that she probably needed that 2nd job because of all the expenses of college. Unfortunately, I was at Auburn living what I thought was my best life. I was partying and drinking almost every night of the week. My grades were terrible because I was focused on having a good time. After I graduated from college, I realized what I had put my mother through during those days. I wrote her a letter apologizing for my behavior and thanking her for all she did for me. This was the first of many letters I wrote to Mom.

Mom was always there for me no matter what. She just knew when I needed her and showed up. I remember once after I was married, I started having some health issues. I called her from work one morning and told her I was having problems and I had a doctor’s appointment later that day. When I walked in the doctor’s office for my appointment, there she sat waiting on me. When both our children were born, she came and stayed about a week with us to help with the babies. She was always there for me in both the good and bad times. 

Mom was the first person I called when I had good news or bad news. She celebrated with me and grieved with me. I called her numerous times a day whether to just talk or to ask for cooking advice, dating advice, or advice on raising children.

Some of my fondest memories were going back home. I would get butterflies in my stomach. I would be so excited to go spend the weekend with Mom. After the children were born, we would all go spend the weekend. Mom would always cook for us, let me sleep late by getting up with the children, take the children to WalMart and buy them treats. I can still smell the biscuits cooking and hear the bacon frying. There truly is no place like home.

Today, I have a scrap book with all the letters that Mom and I wrote to each other. These letters tell a story of the special bond we had with one another. There is no one on earth I have had the honor and privilege of loving and being loved by longer than my mom.

 After Mom passed, I realized the importance of friendships and that it was something to be taken seriously. Relationships take effort and require nurturing. It was important to me to be intentional about choosing my friends. I prayed about it, made a list of qualities I felt necessary to be a good friend, and chose wisely. Time is precious and it is important to spend the majority of your time with those who lift you up, make you laugh, and that you can be real with in all circumstances. I chose my tribe of a few select friends to walk through this life with me. They know who they are and they know how important they are to me. You do not need many; you just need to nurture the relationships you have that are important. 

Relationships are the one thing that carry over into eternity. Your most important relationship is with Jesus. When you follow Him and His lead, you can give and receive from others what is most important. Choose your friends wisely, cherish them while you are together, and honor them for the rest of your life.